April 30, 2014

Batteries Not Included

Girl Tested, Boyfriend Approved  

As much as I boast "size matters" (which is my personal opinion and nothing more), I wouldn't sleep with or settle down with a man based solely on his endowment. But then again, if ever I were to meet a man with a penis that had eight definitive speeds, moved in at least three unique patterns, whose base swirled and vibrated, had a 360 rotating head and NEVER went soft - I might marry him on the spot. If it did all that it wouldn't even need to be big...

Okay, yeah it would still be nice. But I digress...

It has all the joys of a penis - plus some perks - distilled into a battery operated, conveniently sized device that can be hidden in a purse (although that kind of depends on the purse) or a bedside table. Just in case the photos didn't already tip you off - this week's topic is:

The Sex Toy

The beauty of a sex toy is that it's right for any occasion. A quiet day off, or a dry spell between partners. A day in bed with your significant other, between rounds. A night you've both decided to spice it up a little. When someone's out of town and you need material for your video chat. A sex toy is almost never the wrong answer.

Show and Tell

Sex toys come in all sorts of shapes, sizes and colors, and can function very differently. While I may consider myself an expert in full lotus and floating over a lily pad when it comes to having orgasms, I don't pretend to be an expert at everything having to do with getting to them, including sex and sex toys. I can't tell you what is or is not guaranteed to work for you. For the answers to that, you've got to do the leg work. So rather than recommending sex toys the way a "sexpert" might, I'm going to do a little show and tell. (Oh no, not literally. I don't want my blog getting banned in the states...) I'm going to share what my favorite sex toy is and why (show), and then share which ones stood out for me when I did some amateur market research (tell).

My favorite sex toy can actually be seen in the photo above, in several colors, facing several directions. My personal one is pink, as in the photo below. The Doc Johnson i-Vibe Rabbit.

Source: http://www.docjohnson.com/ivibe-rabbit.html

The Doc Johnson i-Vibe has eight speeds and three functions. The speeds control both the intensity of the rabbit ears (which vibrate against the clitoris) and the speed of the rotating head, while the functions control the pattern in which the rotating head...rotates. And while all this is happening, the pearls at the base swirl around for extra sensation. Did I mention that the ears and the head vibrate/swirl at independent speeds?

I like this vibrator because it has extremely versitile use. Even if you're not in the mood for penetration (and since the vibrator is pretty girthy and a lot more unyielding than a real penis, even the slightest penetration is significant) you can still use the rabbit ears on their own. With penetration, I find it intense enough even without using any of the rotating functions. The only drawback to solo use that I personally find is that there are A LOT of buttons and settings, and once you have a firm, vibrating penis a couple of inches inside you and vibrating ears trembling against your clit, it's a little difficult to remember what button does what, and leaning over to check isn't the most comfortable thing in the world in that particular moment. 

However, when using it with a partner, my experience with the i-Vibe has been divine. All those buttons are no longer an issue when you're letting your man drive. The first time I had a boyfriend use a vibrator on me I worried that it might be awkward. That maybe he'd feel threatened - after all, it does things a normal penis cannot do (unless it's been implanted with hydraulics). What I didn't consider was that I'd basically handed him a video game. A video game that was going to bring me to multiple orgasms, making it even better than Halo or NBA Live. Not only did it take "what does this button do?" to a whole new level, using it before sex enabled us to try some positions that would normally be too much for me right away. (Attention size queens: This is a GREAT warm up option!)

Babes in Toyland

During my research I came across two toys that blew my mind. I'll have to flip a coin to decide which one will be my next purchase because I'm equally intrigued by both the We-Vibe 4 and Hello Touch

Source: http://we-vibe.com/we-vibe-4

What I love about the We-Vibe 4 is that it isn't meant to be used in lieu of a penis. It's meant to enhance the act of sex itself. It manages to vibrate against the G-Spot and the clitoris during sex, meaning your partner gets to enjoy it too. This seems like a great option for couples. It also has a crazy variety of vibration patterns and intensities. I'm having a really hard time staying on task here and not whipping out my credit card right now.

Source: http://gizmodo.com/5976214/hello-touch-may-be-the-best-sex-toy-ever-invented

But I can't, because I'm torn between that and the Hello TouchHello Touch is a toy that straps onto your wrist and basically turns any of your two fingers into vibrators. This is ideal in almost any situation. If you're alone it removes the hassle of figuring out which button is which - you already know where your fingers are, right? And if not, how amazing would it be if your partner had vibrating fingers? How amazing would it be if you both did? 

See? This is why I need to flip a coin...

Some think sex toys are only for the kinky, bored or dissatisfied, but I disagree. There's nothing wrong with having a little fun, and the words fun and toy kind of go together - right?

Additional information about all of the toys mentioned above can be found by clicking on their links either above or below. 

Happy vibrations, ladies. Batteries not included.

x's and many O's,


More posts like this on Belle Rosada's sex blog O School 
For quick tips and bedroom tricks check out Orgasm Control


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